When the flesh says no

    My thoughts are distant, I’m struggling to stay focused on the sermon but my mind keeps drifting. As our pastor continues on I strive to bring myself back to the present but my mind is filled with thoughts of my upcoming trip, it is hard to keep myself attentive. Quiet thoughts keep mocking me, telling me I cannot do it, that I shouldn’t even try, impressing upon me the pain of parting from my family, the fear of being alone in that country and away from my family so long, scaring and weighing me down.

    In these quiet times as I sit and contemplate my trip, that’s when Satan attacks me with the afore mentioned thoughts till I feel I cannot do it and just want to give up and stay home, which is exactly what he wants me to do. I strive to overcome such thoughts and focus instead on what God is going to do through this trip and all that follow yet it is hard. My spirit is willing but my flesh is weak.  In my heart I eagerly cry “yes Lord, I will go!'” But my flesh says “No! Don’t send me! I can’t do that Lord, I can’t handle being gone that long.”

   In the midst of such thoughts I hear that familiar gentle voice whispering to my heart, “My child, what is this you are saying to yourself? Surely I have been with you in the past from your first breath even until this present moment and will continue to be so even into eternity.You can and you will do this and you will do it for Me. I have chosen you for this special mission in life and I will give you the strength and courage to carry on even when it feels you cannot go any further.”

     Oh me of little faith! When will I yet learn this lesson and rely not on my strength and will power but His!?! Though I cannot see the future, in times like these it enough for me to know that He can and that He will not lead me astray. Truly I can do all things through Christ and in Him I will never find myself falling short of what I need to fulfill His present command.

           “For no word from God will ever fail.”  Luke 1:37

“For the glory of God!”